You scream at
gore and whores in films
but show indifference
to the children your mother kills
It must be a lie
you’ve never seen it happen
Your mother reeks of metal and Agent Orange
The unexploded bombs in Laos
american soldier yellow fever
I fetishize neoliberals for fun
She falls asleep to
echoing screeches
and democratic promises
plane crash sound effects
im so fucking angry
my unclipped nails
leave craters in my palms
She loves her own children
(she loves you)
but i can never forgive her
for killing mine
So i cry myself to sleep
Because i wonder if
you would care if i died
I never told you how you remind me of her
Only sometimes
Like when i said “imperialism is kind of ass”
i smiled and waited for your reaction
of course i was joking
But i saw you scowl in the corner of my eye
Hold me so i do not doubt
That you will be good to me
That was ten years ago
but i still look for you everywhere
it makes me want to die
When you laugh at my jokes
And i realize i could never hate you
